Every day we hear of someone who said or did something mean-spirited, cruel or just plain evil. Our natural reflex is to feel outrage and anger and to wish for some sort of retribution.

This natural reflex is encouraged and promoted by all sorts of nefarious actors online, in the media, and sometimes in our own circle of friends, associates, and family.

Here’s a question: How much time spent on noticing and reacting to these situations is rewarded with something worthwhile? Something like justice, positive change, growth, or achievement (however one might define such things these days)?

A more pointed question: How much benefit do you derive?

Attention and energy are finite qualities. We only have so much on any given day. When we are drawn into anger-inducing activities, we spend some of both. Without being aware of what we are doing or why, we can find ourselves exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally. Consider what happens then. We fall into unhealthy behaviors, speak before thinking, perhaps lash out at those closest to us in sheer frustration.

It’s not good. Some say this disruption is intentional, that we are being encouraged to expend our most precious time and attention on things that drain us rather than pay attention to what makes us stronger and healthier. You don’t have to be a conspiracy theorist to recognize coercive behavior.

People do dumb stuff. Sometimes “people” includes me. Dumb stuff interpreted by others as mean-spirited, cruel, or evil is what generates escalating anger.

Don’t play. Remove yourself from sources of provocation while acknowledging they’re there. Disengage from conversations that lead nowhere. Refuse to gossip. Curb your desire to have an opinion on things you know little about.

Instead, seek things that nurture, heal, and build. Notice the cadence of your days and find ways to incorporate rest and appreciation. Short periods of silence can be enormously restorative. You have full control over where you direct your attention. Choose wisely.